Well, I skipped a run for the first time ever today.
In the past I’ve had to cut distance or switch up hills with speed training, but I’ve never just skipped the scheduled run on my plan. I just couldn’t go out there today. I didn’t have it in me to get all my gear on to run in the cold, wind, and snow. (Doesn’t help that I don’t have the proper footwear for this type of running either) I didn’t have the energy or the motivation to fight with the extreme winds for even 5K. Yep, this morning I was totally fading.
It also doesn’t help that I don’t like winter at all. Yes, you read that right – I am a born & raised Canadian who doesn’t like winter. I’m usually pretty good with it until January 2, but then after the holidays are over I am ready for spring, sun, and getting back outdoors. I don’t know, for some strange reason I am totally dependent on sunshine and being outdoors for energy. So, in the winter, I do suffer from seasonal affective disorder. If you’re wondering, I do take LOTS of vitamin D, try to get outside when I can, and exercise but it doesn’t always help… like today.
You can imagine how awful I felt this morning. Going back and forth and back and forth trying to motivate myself to run outside, while also thinking that it probably wouldn’t be safe. But, I don’t like to skips runs and I don’t like feeling like a failure. What’s wrong with me?! How is missing one run a failure in my training? I have a great base and I could probably run 30K (Around the Bay) right now… but I wouldn’t feel too great after! 😛
Anyways, I find it amazing how we can make up these rules and imaginary faults to beat ourselves up over. Seriously, it’s one run! So, I had a quick chat with some great runner friends on Twitter this morning and they helped me turn my perspective around. I realized that it’s ok to miss one run… or even more! And, it’s ok to listen to my mind or body and realize that maybe I just needed a break. Can’t forget the mental part of this running game! If I wear myself down early, I won’t have it in me to keep going when the distance gets tough and long.
Not all was lost this morning though. I went out for a walk, which ended up confirming the good decision to not run and then I did an at home workout. Once my endorphins were boosted, I was back on track for a good day! This experience helped me learn a good lesson about quieting my inner critic when it comes to my training. There is no need to make myself feel bad and no one is keeping score, so I need to just do what is right for me. My first season winter running has exposed some new challenges that I am taking on, for better or for worse, and preparing me to be a better runner all year round.
How do you deal with negative self-talk when you have to miss a run/workout?